Ahh, labels? I hope this thought gives you comfort in the dead of night -- when there is nobody around to impress and the creeping, chilling knowledge that you are giving into one of the most rapidly growing trends of modern times in a massive way. Everyone fucking knows who you are, what are you talking about? They are as by the numbers and color-coded as Juggalos and hardcore kids, who are only less evolved assholes.

I was running some errands and encountered the venue where my sister's friend threw a social gathering, which I attended when I was 16-years-old.

I had no idea why I even bothered to partake in such buffoonery. I am one who does not like to feed off my energy in that sort of environment and the music is always almost terrible. I suppose, I felt left out and did not feel 'normal' for enjoying things that most people do. I faintly remember a group of girls impeding me from departing the party because they wanted a picture of me. I felt uncomfortable and life was puzzling.

When I was at that venue today, I saw the same group of girls and they, yet again, asked if they could take a photograph of me. Thus, realized that my life still does NOT make any sense.

The little white wires hung down from my ears,
tucked into my over-sized military green jacket.
My eyes were a little vacant.
In my own musical world,
walking to my soundtrack --
stars in my own music video,
almost oblivious to the world around me.
Thank you, Steve Jobs.

I can see how you came to that conclusion, but it is a bit unfair that I have been misunderstood and mistreated for being this way, for being myself. Currently, everyone is aligning with this particular 'persona' because it is what is 'trendy.' They treat it like it is something to be proud of. De facto, it is a complicated disorder. Whatever, I should even care for such trivial things. I will be in my own little bubble, forever.

&-less

I HAVE TO WORK
& MAINTAIN STRAIGHT A'S
& ATTEND CLUB MEETINGS
& DO VOLUNTEER WORK
& PARTICIPATE IN COMMUNITY SERVICE
& STABILIZE AN INTERNSHIP
& I GET SO STRESSED OUT
BECAUSE I DON’T NEED TO DO THESE ACTIVITIES,
BUT I CHOOSE TO.
I DON’T WANT TO,
BUT I WANT TO.
DOES THAT MAKE ANY SENSE!?

My deepest fear would be my manager finding all of my social network sites and her reading me all of the passages in which I complain about how much I hate working for American Apparel.

I was at the mall and this young woman told me that I am handsome. She thought I was a boy; I did not even bother to correct her because of how often I get misgendered, hahahah.